This past Thursday when I was at the optometrist to choose a new pair of glasses, it struck me how my eyes became all lit up and looking happy again, when I looked myself in the mirror. I've felt for many years that this sensation is a form of validation, that I believe mankind is really in need of, that it's the real answer to most of our problems in society. Take notoriety as an example (to do a vicious deed in order to become famous and gain recognition in the public media such as on the news). Would this be a goal, if those people really felt seen and validated in a confirming way of their own true selves?
I think, we take to social media to be seen. To feel seen by others. Perhaps we live isolated lives or are around others that don't fit neither our standards, nor our interests. In one way, such as for me, I see social media as an outlet for my creativity and thoughts as well as a place to share my opinion, that I hope will contribute to shaping a better world, and not at all a place for private interactions more than with friends and fellow dancers.
On the other hand, I certainly feel so much better when I'm busy in my own life and not really have the time or the need to go online at all. When we're present online, we're not present offline. But Internet can serve as a place to wind down on, to feel updated on the news, and to be connected to those living far away.
Back to becoming seen. In order for this to become a real validation, we must state our honest needs and get them fulfilled with our best interest at the heart of the exchange. There must be a win-win, which it in fact usually becomes even by simply being truly present for another person. It feels good to be loving. And it feels even better to be loving also when others aren't. Dare to really meet the next person you interact with! Go for a bus ride, chat up a stranger in a café or in a waiting room and look yourself in the mirror after. Your eyes should be reflecting your own aliveness. That is sharing the light.
You can find more about this in my book "The Call for Divine Mothering".
Comments