It dawned upon me today, why it can be so hard to say no sometimes. The other person might simply want you to feel guilty about it. They might have both good and pure intentions, yet it doesn't fit well with ours, or is good for us to, so we need to say no. Then a guilty conscious trip about it, whether by ourselves or insinuated by the other, is what undermines our empowered stance to lead our own lives. We don't want to let someone down or not be appreciative. Yet, it's our choice to and we must be able to.
My example today, was simply that I was offered pancakes with jam, which of course is both yummy and thoughtful at a first glance. On Thursdays, it's even considered a bit of a sacred tradition in Sweden to have after a bowl of soup. We like to have certain dishes at certain days here, such as fish on Tuesdays and soup and pancakes on Thursdays. Pancakes are sweet and nice, and something I normally do like. But the majority of all pancakes contain regular wheat flour, which contains gluten, which would upset my stomach tomorrow. So, then it looks like I say no to a caring offer, but what I really am doing, is to care about myself and expressing that.
What would you like to say no to? How does others behave towards you when you do? Are they giving you a guilt-trip or being supportive?
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